Redneck Love Poem

Susie Lee done fell in love,
She planned to marry Joe;
She was so happy 'bout it all
She told her Pappy so.

Pappy told her, Susie Gal
You'll have to find another,
I'd just as soon yo' Ma don't know
But, Joe is yo' half brother.

So Susie put aside her Joe
And planned to marry Will,
But after telling Pappy this
He said, "There's trouble still.

You can't marry Will, my Gal,
And please don't tell you' Mother,
But Will and Joe, and several mo'
I know is your half brother."

But Mama knew and said, my Child,
Just do what makes yo' happy,
Marry Will or marry Joe,
You ain't no kin to Pappy.

Farts

A fart it is a pleasant thing,

It gives the belly ease,

It warms the bed in winter,

And suffocates the fleas.

 

A fart can be quiet ,

A fart can be loud,

Some leave a powerful

Poisonous cloud.

 

A fart can be short,

Or a fart can be long,

Some farts have been known

To sound like a song.

 

A fart can create

A most curious medley,

A fart can be harmless,

Or silent and deadly.

 

A fart might not smell,

While others are vile,

A fart may pass quickly,

Or linger a while

 

A fart can occur

In a number of places,

And leave everyone there,

With strange looks on their faces.

 

From wide-open prairie,

To small elevators,

A fart will find all of

Us sooner or later.

 

But farts are all bad,

Is simply not true

We must never forget

Sweet old farts like you!